If you have to ask...

Here's an epiphany I just had: if you have to ask someone where you stand (relationship-wise) chances are that you probably already know the answer. And it isn't a good one (unless you hate the person and really don't want them to like you--then congrats!). I've had these moments, and they suck. But it's also really informative. If I have to wonder where I stand with a guy, then chances are he's just not feeling it because if he was, then I wouldn't have to wonder, I'd know.

Now, early on in a relationship or whatever you want to call it, I think it's ok to wonder. Hey, that's half the fun, the oh-my-gosh, crush is forming stage where you're talking but things haven't gotten serious. There's no need to rush that part and put a label on things, so don't ask. But after a time (and I can't really put a definitive number on this, but I think you start to get an inkling)... it's natural to start to question things. I also think that when the time and the person is right, you won't have to wonder.

I realize this epiphany may be a "no shit Sherlock" nugget of knowledge for many of you. But if you're like me, maybe a little rusty dealing with members of the opposite sex, and have a need for definitive answers before you tie a neat ribbon around a chapter and begin to move on, well this was a moment of enlightenment. Maybe on some level I knew it all along. My gut feelings have had an amazing tendency of being right. But as far as actually listening to and believing in what I deep down know to be the truth, well I've got a ways to go on that one...

via 

p.s. That awesome guy Dave I was telling you about? I was very sad to hear that he passed away on Thursday, the day after I found out about him. It's tough when someone like that suddenly leaves in the blink of an eye, but it's amazing to think how many people he was able to touch in such a short amount of time. I certainly will try and mirror the optimism and joy he found everyday in my own life.